


Stay Calm

by saturnineIlluminatus



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Post-Game(s), Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-06
Updated: 2012-03-06
Packaged: 2017-11-01 14:04:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/357664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saturnineIlluminatus/pseuds/saturnineIlluminatus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Dave Strider, and today is the six hundred and forty-eighth day without your brother.</p><p>You're staring down at his grave now, tears staining your shirt. You try to stay calm. But you can't. How can you be calm when the only person you ever cared about, the only person who took care of you, is dead and gone?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stay Calm

Your name is Dave Strider, and today is day six hundred and forty-eight.

You stare down at your brother's grave and sigh. Six hundred and forty-eight days without your brother, days that have felt like years to you.

You feel the tears roll down your face, but you quickly wiped them away, realising after that there was nobody around to see them anyways. You'd told yourself day after day that you were much too cool to be caught mourning over a dead guy, but when day three hundred and eighty-nine rolled around you accepted that even cool guys needed to cry.

You wonder how many tear drops have stained the ground, what it's like down there in the ground. Is it cold? Unknowingly you say out loud, "I wish you'd tell me so I could write a letter to someone and get wrapped in a blanket before I get buried." You chuckle a bit at the thought. "Bro, seeing your name on a gravestone and knowing you're buried down there is kinda painful. I can't even describe how I feel right now.

"I just... I want you here. I wanna be down there with you. I'd be anywhere as long as you would be right there with me. I miss it, I miss everything. I'm trying to remember but I just keep on forgetting. I yell and scream and cry, I'm trying not to let go, but... each little moment is slowly slipping away. Kinda like how you slipped away from me.

"Maybe if I hadn't touched that game you'd still be here. You'd be waiting for me on the rooftop, ready to strife. You'd beat me, just like always. But... you're not there. I keep going up there, thinking that maybe you're gonna be there, thinking that this is all some fucking joke and that you're gonna be up there, ready to laugh in my face for being so gullible. But there's nothing.

"That's the thing. That's the fucking thing! I relive the memories again and again and again until I can't anymore! When I finally stop thinking about them it hits me like a pile of fucking bricks. It crashes down on me like rain during a hurricane. I just keep on telling myself that everything'll be alright, but we both know it won't. Nothing'll be alright anymore!" By now your glasses are smeared with tears, your nose starting to drip. Your anger rises, your sadness soars. Everything that you've been hiding for the past six hundred and forty-eight days are showing their ugly faces.

You cry harder, finding it hard to breathe. You fall to your knees and look down, your tears staining your shirt, the dry gravestone. "J-just come back... I need you... I need you more than anything in the fucking world. I'm alone, and I'll admit it, I'm scared. I don't know what the fuck's gonna happen, and I need you here to at least try to fucking comfort me! I can't be going to this fucked up, eerie place every other day just to remind myself that you're fucking dead and I'm still alive waiting for a fucking miracle to come and bring you back!" You're screaming, your voice cracking.

You try to stay calm. But you can't. How can you be calm when the only person you ever cared about, the only person who took care of you, is dead and gone? How can you be calm when you can't see his body, hear his voice, feel his warmth anymore? How can you be fucking calm if you know he's dead?!

You take a deep breath, and you swear you hear his voice whisper the way he always has, "Calm down, Dave. Just calm down."

**Author's Note:**

> This won't mean much to anyone who hasn't read On The Edge, but I'm actually writing a sequel to it.  
> So get ready for more Dave/John Sadstuck.


End file.
